It’s been a long, long time since I’ve felt the urge to recap anything on TV, but I have sooooo many feelings about Alex Danvers and Maggie Sawyer on Supergirl, you guys. So many. So, here I am. I was going to jump ahead to 2.06, because THE FEELINGS, but I’ll start at the beginning of this emotional rollercoaster.

Also, I think we all need a happy place right now, and this is mine. So, let’s do this.

the ladies

ALEX DANVERS

Supergirl’s adoptive big sister. Badass DEO agent. Generally amazing person who must be protected at all costs.

MAGGIE SAWYER

Badass lesbian NCPD officer. Terrible pool player. Thinks aliens are cool.

when alex met maggie

*cue romantic lighting*

*cue ambient music*

*cue eyes meeting across a smoky room*

Just kidding. There’s none of that.

We’re at a crime scene, and there’s really no better place for two justice-obsessed, crime-fighting workaholics to meet.

The female President of the United States (*sob*) has been attacked by a fireball-shooting alien, and Supergirl and her sister, DEO Agent Alex Danvers, are on the case.

But they’re not the only ones.

What is this feeling, so sudden and new?

I felt the moment I laid eyes on you.

My pulse is rushing.

My head is reeling.

My face is flushing.

What is this feeling?

Alex isn’t sure what this feeling is, so she struts over to greet it with a friendly, “Hey! What the hell do you think you’re doing in my crime scene?” which is how all true romances start.

Maggie Sawyer introduces herself as, “Detective Maggie Sawyer NCPD Science Division. We handle all cases involving aliens and things that go bump in the night.”

And Alex is like, “Oh yeah? Well I have a badge too!” Except Alex’s badge is magical and changes identities through the sheer power of will, so instead of DEO Agent Alex Danvers, we get, “Alex Danvers Secret Service.”

And then she goes on to tell Maggie that she’s getting her pretty-girl cooties all over her evidence. And Maggie’s like, “Oh, my pretty-girl cooties? Well, that dude over there just bagged some carpet and some limo together in the same baggie. So, what do you have to say about that, Secret Service Agent Alex Danvers?”

And Alex is like, “Well, we have big fancy toys back at my super secret secret agent lab. So, pfft.”

“This is within my jurisdiction.”

“NO, MINE!”

And then this back-and-forth over who wants to kiss the other the hardest ends with Maggie conceding, and walking away with a smirk and a, “See you around, Danvers.”

Alex is still not sure what this feeling is, but she probably kind of likes it and hates it at the same time.

Okay, I know that this is a totally unimportant detail to point out, but I really loved that the next thing Alex does is yell at the dude who was bagging the evidence incorrectly. Like, “How dare you not do your job properly,” but also, “How dare you embarrass me in front of the cute girl?”

of all the empty warehouses, you had to burst into mine

The next time Alex and Maggie happen upon each other, Alex is in full DEO agent gear, leading a tactical team, and carrying a bazooka. How can any of us beat that, really?

Maggie instantly surrenders, because she’s a lesbian, and only human, and have you seen Alex Danvers in her DEO gear?

She compliments Alex’s fire power, and then correctly guesses that Secret Service Agent Alex Danvers is actually DEO Agent Alex Danvers, which Alex neither confirms nor denies because the alien she was chasing got away, and Maggie Sawyer is too pretty and too confusing, so it’s best to just focus on work.

Alex returns to DEO headquarters, where she eventually receives a call from Maggie Sawyer asking if Alex wants to know “how us local cops deal with aliens?” Which is a line we should all use from now on.

Sidebar: How exactly did Maggie get Alex’s number?

Maggie: I’m a detective, Ingrid. I detect.

Makes sense.

Anyway, Alex considers the offer for about .00000000000000001 seconds before agreeing because the pretty girl is on the phone asking her to do things, and Alex may be confused, but she’s not stupid.

come here often?

Alex makes a most heterosexual entrance by arriving on her Ducati.

Maggie then tries to keep up by saying she’s got a Triumph Bonneville T100 at home, and then they fight over who owns the most flannel, before remembering why they’re there.

And by “there” I mean this creepy alley.

Alex: What are we doing here?

Maggie: I thought I’d buy you a drink.

Who said romance was dead?

As a general rule, I’d advise against allowing cute girls (or anyone) to lure you into dark alleyways unless you’re a highly trained, secret government agent, which, thankfully, Alex Danvers is. So on we go.

On the other side of this password-protected door, is a bar.

Alex: So, this is your big hook-up? A dive bar?

Alex is unimpressed, but Maggie tells her to look closer. Alex does look closer, and gets checked out by a cute alien chick for her troubles, which is confusing, but not alarming enough to require fire power.

Upon further inspection, Alex spots a guy with pointy ears, which is apparently too much, because Alex responds by reaching for her gun.

Maggie grabs her arm to stop her because this is supposed to be a safe space, and we do not shoot aliens in alien safe spaces.

Maggie’s touch seems to be enough to calm Alex down a tad.

Alex: What the hell is this place?

Maggie: It’s a safe haven. A place for off-worlders to hang out, have a drink, not feel so alone for a minute.

Maggie leads them to a table, and Alex realizes that this is where Maggie comes to get her information about the alien population in National City.

Maggie: They also make a mean peach mojito.

It is at this point that things, having already been pretty gay, somehow manage to get gayer.

The waitress drops off the beers Maggie ordered upon arrival, and she looks Alex up and down distastefully. “You moved on quick,” she says to Maggie, before walking away.

Alex’s reaction to that is this:

And this is where Alex Danvers reminds us that she’s a huge fucking nerd, because the next words out of her mouth are not something normal like, “What was that about?” No. Instead, we get this:

Alex: That waitress, is she Roltikkon?

Maggie: Yes. She is.

Alex: I’ve read Roltikkon can form telepathic connections by making physical contact with the dorsum of the tongue.

I giggled just typing that. But then Maggie, who is probably thinking, “Wow, you’re a huge fucking nerd,” decides that coming out is a more pressing matter.

Maggie: How do you think she learned English? She’s my ex.

I honestly can’t even guess what Alex is thinking, so I’m just going to screencap her reaction:

As Alex is adding two and two together to arrive at something totally G-rated, Maggie then feels the need clarify that she does not date strictly aliens.

Maggie does, however, prefer aliens to most humans.

Alex manages to process all of this information in time to ask Maggie why that is.

Maggie: I relate to them. Growing up a non-white, non-straight girl in Blue Springs, Nebraska, I might as well have been from Mars. I was an outcast and I felt like it. Our alien neighbors, they’re no different. Most of them are hard-working immigrants or refugees just trying to get by. They have to hide who they are in order to survive. I can sympathize with that.

Alas, this bonding moment is cut short by the arrival of some alien dude, because this is still a TV show with a plot, and we must get back to that. Maggie presses him for information on the alien baddie they’re after. The dude doesn’t seem all that keen in helping them, so Alex uses a little force as a motivational tool.

That does the trick, and back into Plotville we go.

it wouldn’t be true love without a kidnapping

Team Supergirl catches the baddie with fifteen minutes left to go of the episode, so we already know that they caught the wrong guy. But it’s a beautiful day, and Madam President (*sob*) is about to give a speech about alien inclusion, and both Alex and Maggie are there to witness history in the making.

Alex, however, is having a little trouble keeping her eyes off Maggie.

But she catches herself and quickly looks away because she still doesn’t know what these feelings are, and Maggie is still too pretty and confusing, and now, on top of all of that, we know she’s also gay.

But there’s no time for that because the REAL baddie starts shooting fireballs at the President again, and it’s time to spring into action. Alex gets fireballed into a fountain, while Maggie tries her luck with a gun.

Holding a metal object up to someone who’s shooting fire proves to be about as successful as one might imagine.

Long story short: Maggie gets kidnapped by the Big Bad. Why would the alien kidnap Maggie, one may wonder? I don’t know, but I imagine it’s so that Alex can go rescue her.

Alex recognizes the baddie as the chick she’d bumped into at the bar, and so she returns there to ask some questions.

Our friend, the alien dude, is once again there, and Alex approaches him for some information. He seems to have forgotten that Alex almost broke his hand the other night because he’s pretending he doesn’t know anything.

It is here that Alex reminds us that while she’s still a huge fucking nerd, she’s also a huge fucking nerd who kicks ass.

Alex: That woman kidnapped Maggie Sawyer, a woman who risks her life every day fighting for your rights. She cares about what happens to you. The least you can do is return the favor.

Alex likes Maggie. Pass it on.

Alien dude still refuses to give anything up, but the bartender pipes in and gives Alex a lead. “She hangs out down by the foundry.”

Is she a blacksmith? is a question we don’t have time to ask ourselves, because Maggie Sawyer is back on our screens, and she’s all tied up.

Why would this alien chick who shoots fireballs and hangs out by a foundry kidnap an NCPD detective and then tie her up, when her beef is with the President? is also a question we don’t have time to ask ourselves.

We learn that Big Baddie is against the President’s Alien Amnesty laws because she believes they’re not about alien/human equality, but about aliens outing themselves to the government so the government can find them.

Supergirl arrives just in time to call this a cynical worldview, and distracts Big Bad long enough for Alex to untie Maggie.

And then they play a game I like to call, “Which one of us has the bigger death wish?”

Alex wins this round.

Alex is like, “Get the gun and get out.” And Maggie is like, “Have you met me at all?” And then Alex runs off to distract the baddie. And Supergirl manages to weaken her opponent by flying around her in really fast circles.

And just as Big Bad is about to come to from her dizzy spell, Maggie knocks her out with a metal pipe.

To which Supergirl and Alex both react thusly:

Maggie: You guys are fun.

Yes, they are. They’re also huge, loveable dorks.

what is this feeling tho?

It appears Maggie got a scratch on her arm during all of that crime-fighting, and I can only imagine that Alex dragged her kicking and screaming to the DEO facility to get checked out, because Maggie doesn’t strike me as the sort of person who’d seek medical help willingly.

Maggie greets Alex by showering the DEO in praises.

Maggie: This place is sick. Like James Bond bad-guy hide-out sick.

Alex: Yeah, we have our moments.

Alex is trying so hard to play things so cool, and she’s almost managing it. ALMOST.

Alex: Minor first-degree burns and a bruised collarbone. You should be fine in a few days.

Maggie: Gee, I didn’t think you cared.

Alex: Yeah, well… pfff.

Yeah, well… pfff?!?!

YEAH, WELL… PFFF!!?!

Badass Alex Danvers who’s not afraid to fight off aliens the size of buildings, and who rushes head-first into danger without a second thought, goes, “Yeah, well.. pfff,” when a cute girl dares to suggest she might care.

That is all it took to turn Alex Danvers into a pile of mushy goo, and that’s around the time I went, “Wow, you’re screwed.”

Maggie tries to salvage Alex’s dignity by claiming she was just kidding, and that she owes her big for saving her life. Alex then tries to un-mushy goo herself by talking about how Maggie helped her to see that not all aliens are evil.

Dude, your sister’s an alien. Superman was just there helping you all of five minutes ago. Your boss is a Martian.

But I’m giving Alex a pass because it’s clear that she has no idea how to function around cute lesbians, and we’ve all been there.

Also, Maggie doesn’t help at all by being all, “You know, I don’t really do well with partners, but I think we made a pretty good team,” which I’m pretty sure makes Alex’s stomach all fluttery.

Alex is doing her best not to visibly melt into a puddle, even though it’s clear she’s not at all sure how to navigate any of the feelings she’s feeling. So, she manages a, “Yeah, we did,” while avoiding all eye-contact.

Maggie then grabs her jacket to leave, but Alex is like, “Wait, no, stay,” because she needs to rest and heal from her super severe injuries that were treated with a band-aid. She can stay there, if she wants. Or in Alex’s apartment. In her bed. Or whatever. No big.

Maggie: No, I can’t.

Alex: What, you got a hot date or something?

Maggie: Actually, I do, and I don’t want to leave the lady waiting, so… See you around, Danvers.

Alex reacts to this with what can only be interpreted as disappointment.

Step one: Conceal, don’t feel.

Failed step one.

You are so screwed.

And so am I, for I swore I would not get invested in anything else again, and yet here we are.

Here we are.

And we’re only getting started. More recaps to come.

Continue reading: Supergirl 2.04: Alex/Maggie Recap