Rizzoli & Isles

Rizzoli & Isles Subtexty Recap 3.11 "Class Action Satisfaction"

And we’re finally back with our favorite non-gay (but still totally gay) non-couple (who’s still totally married): Rizzoli & Isles. It’s been too long.

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When last we left things, Jane and Maura had a baby. Or was it Tommy who had a baby? Or was it Jane’s father who had a baby? I’m not sure. Someone had a baby and then abandoned it, and left it for Jane and Maura to raise. Or for Tommy to raise. Or for Mama Rizzoli to raise. I don’t know. But I’m pretty sure there was a baby.

This episode begins like all other episodes: with a murder. A guy is having a fine-looking breakfast, and then drops dead in front of Mama Rizzoli.

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The great thing about the city of Boston is that detectives rarely have to go anywhere to investigate homicides. Bodies just pop up. They fall from the sky while playing softball … they get rolled in while having a spa treatment … they drop dead right there at the station. Boston has the most considerate murderers and corpses out there. I don’t know why they don’t put that on the welcome sign.

So, we’ve got a dead guy at the police station.

Meanwhile, Jane and Maura are…

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… in their pajamas? At Maura’s house? What does this mean? Is it over? Have the shippers won? Have the writers officially given up trying to pretend these two are straight and not into each other? Could it be?

Jane made Maura a cup of coffee – so sweet. You know who makes me coffee in the morning? My girlfriend.

Maura: (spitting the coffee back out) Instant? You served me instant?

Jane: I’m so tired. You’re lucky I didn’t serve you Drano.

Oh, really. Why are you so tired, Jane? What exactly were you crazy kids up to last night? Speak slowly and include graphic details and perhaps a video or two.

Maura: Where’s the baby?

Well, that’s slightly less juicy, but still intriguing. Has this turned into Rizzoli & Isles: Married, With Children?

Jane: Tommy took the last shift.

Tommy, right. Well, that’s disappointing. I guess we’re meant to understand that Jane spent the night at Maura’s helping Tommy with the baby.

(But we all know what really went on…)